Strengthening Marriage with Affirmation: Marriage Devotional Week 5

Step 1: Read the Scripture prayerfully and let it settle in your heart.
Step 2: Read the Reflection, pausing where needed to consider something that speaks to you.
Step 3: Understand and apply this week’s Practice.
Step 4: Pray each day this week for the grace to build a stronger, Christ-centered marriage.

Scripture

Therefore, encourage one another and build up each other, as indeed you are doing.

1 Thessalonians 5:11 (NRSVCE)

Reflection

We’re on Week 5 of our 5-week devotional! How about a little quiz to begin this last week? You’ve got to answer in under 10 seconds. Ready?

What are the top 5 things you love the most about your spouse? Don’t overthink it. Just list the first 5 things that come to mind. Go!

…

Here’s my list:

His forgiving spirit
His praying heart
His ability to do just about anything mechanical
The way he fathers our children
His strength

I’m so thankful I could type that out without a second thought.

How did you do?

If you did that easily, praise God! You know the gift you have been given by God. If that wasn’t as easy for you, don’t be discouraged. This week’s devotional is all about learning to appreciate and build up your spouse.

And as you do that, you’ll be building up your marriage as well.

Speak life, love, and truth into your marriage as you draw on God’s Word.

5 weeks. 5 biblical principles. Get them in your inbox.

The email series includes detailed steps for each week’s Practice as well as printables in an easy-to-save or print format.

JOIN THE SERIES

Recognize the Might of Words

Life moves fast, doesn’t it? Most days, as we speed past each other, focused on getting things done, we’re exchanging quick updates and rattling off to-dos rather than speaking kind words.

It’s easy to speak without giving much thought to the words we use. Easier still to forget how powerful our words can be. They can wound or heal, tear down or build up, discourage or inspire.

Paul knew this truth well. That’s why he reminded the believers in Thessalonica to “encourage one another and build up each other.” He knew that brotherly encouragement would strengthen their relationships and help them live out the love of Christ.

This is true in a marriage as well. Perhaps even more so.

Encourage One Another

Words that hurt are easy to fling around.
“You always…” “Why can’t you just…” “It’s so annoying when you…”

Most often, we don’t mean to wound each other. But intentional or not, hurtful words can cut deep, not just into feelings but into the fabric of our marriage as well.

Encouraging words, on the other hand, are like leaven in a marriage. They lift up our hearts and activate joy, filling our relationship with tenderness and delight.

They speak life into our marriage! They breathe joy into our love.

Make Affirmation a Way of Life

So begin today. Acknowledge the power of your words. Choose to speak life every day, my friend.

Before you speak, ask yourself: “Will these words build up or tear down?”
Appreciate the small things. The way your spouse handles finances, cooks your favorite meal, helps the children with schoolwork, or fixes a leaky faucet. Yes, even that!
Fill your home with words like “I really love you the way you…” and “You are so good at….”
When your spouse is struggling with work or uncertain or feeling down, speak words of affirmation.
Words”I know you can do this, love” can go a long way in boosting confidence and building up your spouse.

A single word of appreciation can change the tone of the day, reminding your spouse that he or she is valued, seen, and loved. As you make encouragement a daily habit, you’ll see little sparks of joy springing up all through your day. A tender smile, a softened tone.

Gratitude and affection will start to sprout happily in both your hearts. You’ll be building something truly wonderful — a deep, joyful Song-of-Songs kind of love that reflects God’s heart.

Isn’t that a beautiful way to live and to love?

Practice

Right now: Ask the Lord to fill your words with gentleness and encouragement.
This week: Focus on speaking words of appreciation and thanksgiving.
After a week: When the week winds down, ask yourself: Was I able to see my spouse with fresh eyes this week? Did I build up or tear down with my words? How have my actions impacted our relationship this week?

Prayer

Father, forgive us for the times our words have torn down rather than built up. Teach us to use our voices to encourage, strengthen, and comfort. When impatience, frustration, or daily cares overwhelm us, help us pause and choose our words in a spirit of love, not anger. Help us to see the good in each other and to appreciate each other and all that we have been given. Make us builders not breakers and strengthen us as we grow our marriage into a deep, intimate union that reflects your love for us. Amen.

JOIN THE SERIES

If you’ve read all five posts of this series…

Congratulations!

You’ve completed the 5-week Speak Life Marriage Devotional!

I hope this journey has helped you slow down, discover new ways to listen with love, and open up your heart to a deeper, more Christ-like marriage.

Keep speaking life, my friend. May God bless you.

In faith,

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Build Each Other Up: Marriage Devotional Week 5

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